Captive heart

  To say I was lost in darkness would be a lie for the blackness surrounding me was merely ashen and my absence one of choice. The place I had hidden myself was one of comfort and refuge; an abode where I could turn a blind eye to the emptiness and solitude nurturing my soul and spirit. In it I clothed myself with rice paper paintings to shield my eyes from the reality outside my walls and committed myself that the monochrome grays forming a comatose landscape of leafless trees and empty streets satisfied me. But from the void beyond me, a flash of color tore across the fragile canvas. A single brushstroke of the brightest blue, thin and bold, pierced my colorblind eyes. Amidst the hues of grey, its vibrance and beauty drew me in and captivated my soul. How had I never know such magnificence existed, that beyond my self-imposed isolation something so exquisite and delicate awaited discovery? And now, it had come to me. What had I done to deserve such grace, that this simple burst of radiance had chosen, for a moment, to brighten my world? How long will it last? Dare I hope for more? Dare I believe it’s even real? What a savage conspiracy of the Divine to tempt my heart with such transcendent splendor only to reveal it an illusion – a manifestation of hope buried deep in my heart.  If it be, let me live the apparition, let it become my new refuge. My heart is captive.